God's graCe..

Oh ya,, just want to copy a quote from my friend’s bLog:
Dunno why,, this quote keep appearing in my mind today...
"God allows us to experience the low points of life in order to teach us lessons we could not learn in any other way. The way we learn those lessons is not to deny the feelings but to find the meanings underlying them"

Maybe you don’t know what He wants when we suffered,, confuse of what He wants from us when He aLLows us feel sad.. Just remember that He knows everything,, so you dun have to worry.. As Long as u’ve tried ur best & the rest,, just Leave it up to Him.. Just rely on Him.. Keep in mind that He will give the best @ the right time!!! Yes,, God is great,, God is good… He knows what’s the best for us,, keep believing it !!

When I woke up this morning,, suddenLy a voice crossed my thought… It whispered to read Psalm 8… Okay,, I obeyed it.. Opened my bible & read it…
Oh,, how great it is.. it teLLs us how great is our God…Yupz,, I reaLize we’re nothing without Him.. Looking back this whoLe year… How He reaLLy heLps me in everything that I’ve done.. How Lucky I am that I know Him,, my hero… He aLLows me to experience the affection from my parents,, the kindness from aLL of my friends though they’re not here with me,, and the warmth of famiLy in God here …

Sometimes, I think I ask Him too much… I asked for this,, asked for that,, aksed for it… But what have I given to Him?? Not much!! I even can say… hmm… Nothing!!! Why am I so greedy?? I don’t have right to ask anything from Him…
But another voice said that He is excellent!!! He aLways Loves us & never ask anything from us,, coz He aLready has everything!!! He onLy asks for our heart… Hohohoho… ActuaLLy it’s very simpLe,, but it’s not an easy thing to do… hahahaha…

That’s why we need friends.. The good one of course.. They who can Lead us & bring us to keep our heart to Jesus.. Thank God that I’ve them aLL… Yeah,, I Luv my ceLLgroup.. Seeing them makes me grow stronger each day in God’s hands.. Whoaaa,, dunno why suddenLy I think about them,, mizz them aLready,, hahahha…

Oh yee,, for Ko David dkk yg mo ke Thai,, enjoy ur holiday !!! Ntar bgitu bLk ke sg Lg,, saya todong oLeh2,, wakakakaka kidding,, kidding… Ntar mo saya tagih criTa,, trus keLanjutan posting2anNa di bLog (hobby br bc bLog org, LoL..LoL..) Buat ce Lydia & ce Fenny yg ke Bintan,, sLamat bersenang2 ce!!! Trus sapa dunk yg ushering mgg bsk ?? hahahaha…. Then,, buat sMua yg tLah & sdg puLang kampong ke indo,, jgn Lupakan Rancu yg ga puLang.. kLo bLk ksiNi,, pd Laporan ke Rani yoo,, sambiL bw upeti oLeh2 jg maksudNa,, hahahahaha… ApaLagi buat some peopLe,, jgn Lupa apa yg udah aku titip yoooo… Hohohoho…

--RanCu--

oLrite..

Sadness comes into me
Another grief comes into my heart
The brutal & angry tears that makes a life worthwhile
My heart is like a symphony
That sings of only pain
When will this seasoned sorrow end?

I don’t blame anyone
Just a little misunderstanding
Sometimes it can bring an unnecessary trouble
This time we talk about pride!

Mommy, do not worry about me
I’m doing well here
I will be okay
Do not angry with anyone,, with anything
I.. I will adjust myself with this situation

Knowing you are sad hurts my heart
So,, promise me that you’re okay
How can I smile knowing that you’re sacrifice that much?
I try my best to handle it all
I’m okay,, trust me…

--Rancu--

The music of My heaRt..

Everytime I try to make myself comfortable,
The more I feel wanna cry
Even if I wipe away those tears secretly
These feeling won’t go away
I regret that I’ve only received
Will you forget me because I haven’t given you anything?

You haunt me still, and so I won’t pretend
My fears sometimes my sentiments betray
Telling me to put my thoughts to sleep
I’m sorry that I disappointed you
Experiences can often teach someone a lot

I know I must have hurt you, caused you pain
Sometimes we have to lose what we most cherish
To understand how much we are in need

So come with me with open mind
And heart, and we the time will prove
Then shall my music be brought to you
Lightly on birds wings
A sound for all you have been through
Without boundaries you are still here

Thus time will heal this wound and leave no scar
Since u now know the pain of losing you

--Rancu--

I need My smiLe…

Today I still have my short break,, my last day before go back to college tomorrow… u know what,, today I woke @ 00.30 am !!!!! OMG,, this is the first time seumur idup bangun jam sgitu.. Salahkan siapa?? Hahaha… Yupz,, mungkin kecapean gara2 kmaren kLi yoo,, abiz br tdr jam 5 pagi,, hohohoho….

A crucial schedule for today: make sure everything is clear !!! hahahaha… Pokokna hari ini hrs seLese smua masaLahna,, ga pake mundur2 Lg,, ga pake aLesan2 Lg… Yg jeLas,, hr ini smuaNa jeLas,, ga ad yg ngambang2 Lg… One of my friend know that aku paling ga suKa yg ga jelas,, smuaNa hrs jeLas !!! But talking is not an easy job,, especially for me in this case.. It’s hard to tell you the truth..

Well,, maybe I can’t do it myself.. I need somebody else to help me.. I need encouragement to do it.. Okay,, u asked me what I want ?? Did I make it clear ?? I want to try it,, let’s do together.. But,, I dun want to tell it coz u mention about her.. Actually I want to say that we can try it first then we’ll see later.. Maybe she can change her mind coz nothing impossible.. Yeah,, she doesn’t even know me yet… But,, I keep it silent.. I dun want force myself to say it.. My friend told me “Rani tuh anaKna seLaLu mentingin kepentingan org Laen dibanding kepentinganNa sendiri..” Well,, it’s true.. Aku ga mau org laen ngaLah demi Rani,, it’s better buat aku yg ngaLah.. Rani udah terLatih buat ngaLah kok.. Rani ga mau org Laen sedih,, kaLopun hrs ad org yg sedih biar Rani aj.. God give me a strong heart supaya Rani bisa tahan smuaNa sendiri.. The other friend toLd me: “Why u never aLLow anybody to help u when u’re down?? U aLways help others facing their difficulties,, but u dun want others to help u..” It’s simply coz Rani ga mo buat org kepikiran masaLah Rani..

Why the differences always be my major problem ??? People say kLo perbedaan tuh buat saLing meLengkapi,, but it can’t be applied to my case.. Though I want it,, but I can’t.. I’m learning not to be a selfish person.. Rani belajar untuk consider other people want.. It’s easy to say,, but it’s hard to do it.. Sometimes I wonder sampai kapan Rani hrs seLaLu ngaLah ?? Is there time for me to win ?? Why I always stuck with those kind of differences among us ?? Last time I also give up with the differences.. There are so many people out there face the same problem with me,, but they can do it.. Why can’t I ?? I know it aLso hard for you… U know,, at that time when I said that u must Listen to her,, part of me said that u can taLk to her about this & I believe she’ll change.. But once again,, I dun want become selfish.. I want u to be a good boy… She’s ur everythin & I’m nobody… Hahahahha…

It’s not my fault,, it’s not ur fault,, it’s not her fault & it’s not His fault… We’ll just stuck in the wrong situation & wrong time… Sorry kLo difference yg ada ga bs untuk diLengkapi… I think u’ve come out with the decision… Thx to Him for this decision… Hopefully this is the best for u… hohohoho… Thx God u’re busy with all those activities that makes u easily forget all we’ve been through…

Thx for ur help… Thx for ur accompaniment… Thx for the shoulder… Thx for ur warm hands… Thx for day & nite we spend together... Thx for understand me… Thx for ur care… Thx for ur kindness to me… Thx to say those words (finally,, hohohoho…) Thx for everythin… ^^
Sorry kLo Rani terLaLu gampang nyerah.. Sorry kLo Rani make it aLL become so easy for you.. Sorry jg kLo Rani yg buKa jLn terLaLu Lebar… Sorry I never show how much I care… Sorry kLo Rani terLaLu teLmi… Sorry if I can’t help u much… Sorry I can’t give u the real smile… Sorry I can’t stop to…. & sorry I can’t say aLL this things directly… ;)

--RanCu--

Thx U so much…

Hohoho….
Huahuahuahua….
Thx yoo yg udah sms,, teLp,, give me testi & yg nyeLametin Lgsg just to say Merry Xmas to me….
Yay,, yay… Although it was raining on 25.12.06,, but it’s okay… Enak segh kLo cuaca adem ayem gini,, panas enggak,, ujan jg nggak.. Tp,, skrg tuh cuaca ga bs diprediksi !! Tiap hari mesti bw paying kmana2,, berat2in aja -_-“….

Nothing special today,, but there was very special moment today.. hahahahaa… Rancu ga segh ???
Yupz,, first I just wanted to stay @ home,, knowing that aLL my friends had their own plan.. But around 10pm (24.12.06),, one of my friend asked me to go out… I love to go out & hanging around with my friend,, so definitely I accepted it!!
Then,, that noon we went to Esplanade.. Actually,, we also confuse to decide the place & kt ga tau dsono ad apa… We just walked around,, Esplanade—Marina Square—Esplanade,, hahahaha.. Bner2 kyk org ga ad kerjaan.. Until the nite came,, we discussed such an important issue for me… It spent very Long time since I couldn’t speak up properly what’s on my mind,, LoL..LoL… Sorry yoo & thx for the time….

Actually,, I also confuse with myself.. I aLready know what I want & but I can’t speak it up.. too many things should I take into account.. My choice of words,, my way to arrange the sentence,, my feeling that I’m afraid to be detected… Some say pernah ngomong ke Rancu kLo aku tuh orgNa sok kuat.. Semua mau diatasin sendiri.. Frankly,, it’s true!!! Sometimes it’s good,, but sometimes it can be bad.. It’s good that kit abs prove kLo kt tuh ga manja,, ga usah terLaLu bergantung sama org laen,, kt bs mandiri !!! But,, ad saat2 tertentu yg kt hrs dibantu org Laen,, kt jg perLu org Laen.. Man,, we Live in community,, we Live with people… Mana ad smuaNa bs dikerjain sendiri tanpa perLu org laen..
One thing that force me to be strong is I don’t want to disturb others… Rancu sebenerna beratttt bgt kLo minta toLong ke org,, coz I know that I will disturb that person.. Rancu cuma ga mau nyusahin org laen lbih banyak Lg,, coz I think aku dah terlaLu banyak ngerepotin & nyusahin org laen… everybody have theor own businesses so I don’t want sacrifice their time just for me.. Yupz,, that makes me feel Like I’m strong & I must be strong…

But,, semakin daLam I pretend to be strong aLL the time,, the more it makes me fragile… Sedikit2 pasti rapuh bangetttt…. & when I feel it,, I just let myself know that I’m sad,, I’m not satisfied,, I’m hurt…. Sometimes I feel become an over emotional person,, just like this nite.. I tried not to cry everytime I’m thinking about it,, but I can’t.. The tears suddenly felt down… This nite @ Esplanade,, at the beginning I forced my friend to go home.. He said he can’t (if I’m a man,, I’LL give the same answer).. But I keep force & force him,, why ?? Bcoz I’LL know that I want to cry & I don’t want he saw me crying… After talking & talking,, I still can’t force him to go home,, so .. no choice… We just sat and try to talk & start another conversation about other topics. Firstly I was crying bcoz I miss them in Jkt… hahahaha… Maybe I need them rite now… Secondly,, I didn’t know that I was crying for another reason.. I cried when my friend was talking about a big problem that we face… I kept hiding & hiding my face coz I’m afraid.. I could think about the outcome of this problem & I pretend that I didn’t know it… But,, he knew that I cried.. He said that I didn’t have to hide it from him…

Just to let you know,, last nite I was crying coz I can’t stop stop thinking about that problem.. Well,, maybe @ the beginning I was crying buat org2 yg akhirNa kuteLpon.. But,, it’s over,, that’s aLL… & the rest,, I was crying bcoz I dun wanna loose…. I dunno whether I cried bcoz of the sadness or the anger or anything else.. I’ve tried to stop & contoL my feeling but I’m failed.. One main reason knapa Rani sLaLu nunda2 & Lamaaaaa bgt ngomong even for 1 sentence,, simply bcoz I stiLL want to spend the time together with u… Why I didn’t have any choice ?? Once I have said that Life is aLL about choices,, but in this case why I can’t choose ?? Where’s all of the choices ?? I didn’t want make he feel sad to see my crying but I couldn’t take it anymore.. Why I’m so pathetic ??? Everytime he asked me,, I just can say a big Lie.. I dun care if u called me a Liar.. U know why? Dengan begitu,, semakin mudah for u to hate me.. Rani ga mau bikin kamu pusing… That’s why.. If I never told u the truth,, it’s easy for u to make the decision.. But unfortunately,, u know that I’m lying.. See,, Rani bikin susah Lagi kan.. See,, I make you confuse & dunno how to decide…

For my friend,, a BIG thx to u mannnnnn…. Hahahahaha… I’m okay.. No need to worry about me again.. Thx for being my good friend,, I think I still need u…

--RanCu--

Christmas Eve..

finaLLy,, here it comes the day !!!!
yay !!! yay !!!!
First of aLL,, I wanna say MERRY CHRISTMAS to aLL my beloved famz & friendz ;)
Thx GOD for everything that I have,, everything that I achieved,, every moment that I experienced,, every people that I love…
Christmas in Sg,, fyuh…fyuh…

As I said in my previous bLog,, this is my 2nd chance to ceLebrate Xmas in Sg… Wow,, it’s reaLLy awesome… Roads are fuLLed with Xmas decoration,, every shop are promoted their products with tempting discount..
Everybody seems very busy.. WeLL,, I don’t know what they’re doin,, but Looking at them makes me dizzy… Especially this Christmas Eve..
After attending Xmas Eve service,, I dunno where shouLd I go,, what shouLd I do…
So,, I, ko David & his Bro,, ce Lydia,, ce Anita,, ce SherLyn & her friend decide to walk around first…
We Looked around Orchard to find a good pLace to chit chat.. Then,, after searching for a while,, we chose NYDC… Yupz,, yupz… we chatted about everything,, important & not important things…

Then, actuaLLy I dunno how could, but we ended up with pLaying cLassicaL game caLLed “Truth or dare”… if I’m not wrong it’s aLL bcoz ce Lydia asked something to ce Anita.. & u know,,, the Luckiest first person to be asked is: ME !!!! is it Lucky or UnLucky ??? okie,, just take it as a Lucky person… Then the story goes on,, I rather choose truth than dare in this kind of game (try to be honest red.).

After that,, koko asked the question.. he asked me: “If u can go anywhere in this Christmas Eve,, with whom you want to be ??” Wooooo,, he said it’s a simple question (well,, it is red.), but to answer it was not as simple as asking it… when I was thinking,, suddenLy his name came out in my mind… A name from few years ago… ****N.. hahahahahaha.. Okie,, people said that we don’t know what we have until it’s gone.. This rule applied to me in this case.. Yupz,, yupz,, when we still together, I never realize how much I care. Well, maybe I’m not a person who shows their careness in usual way. When we still together, I always act somehow like I don’t need him,, like I don’t want to be with him,, pretend to ignore him..

Recently I found out the reason why I act like that.. The reason is I don’t want to be hurt when he’s not around anymore… But, I also realize that the more I pretend to ignore him,, the more I feel pain.. I convinced myself that nothing happen.. I tried to act that I’m a strong girl.. I acted like I didn’t need him.. But, it didn’t work !!!! I even couldn’t stop tionk about him… ckckckckckck…Thus,, after he had gone to a place that quite far from here,, I decided to change my behaviour.. I learn to act like what I really want to do.. No need to pretend anymore.. I’m not afraid to get hurt anymore,, as long as I always keep God in mind,, everything must be ok.. Wow,, he’s the one that can make me like this.. Yes,, he was my big enemy,, my best friend,, my LoveLy bro… He is my 1st Love… ckckkck….

WeLL,, back to the main story again.. Yupz,, yupz,, we played Trurh or Dare for 2nd round. It was Ce Lydia... hahahahaha…. A person who asked her a question was Ko David (again..) Yeah,, somehow he really good to arrange the words to make a good sentence,, hahahaha…. He asked Ce Lyd: “If now you can be with the person that you really want to be,, what kind of kind of occasion do you want to have ?” Hohohoho…. Then she told us that she wants to have a candLe Light dinner with that person.. She hasn’t known yet the exact pLace,, but she wants it.. Having candle Light dinner with a person you love,, surrounding by the music that can lead your mood.. Whoaaa,, so romantic….

Then,, after ce Lydia,, finally,, it was time for our FA Leader to answer the question. Hahahaha…. Everybody thought about what question should we ask,, then Ce Lydia came out with one question.. “TeLL us about your Latest love Life”… huahuahua…. First he confused how to start it,, hohohoho…. Then,, finally he began to tell his story… But,, in the middle of the story,, I saw my friends pass by,, so I called them & talked with them for a while.. It meant that I miss some part of his story !!! huhuhuhuhuu… Wow,, it was a great story (I should ask him more about it,, maybe I can make another story from his story red.)

Although we still want to continue,, NYDC was closed.. we wre “kicked out” by the waitress,, hahahahaha… Then,, we looked a round to find toilet,, but it was very crowded !!!!!!!!!!! Whoa,, I got dizzy everytime I see too may people, got sick of them… Cut the story,, we reach Cineleisure & went to the toilet… it was 00.20.. After talking & talking & talking,, we decided to go back home… So,, we went to Somerset MRT.. Ce Anita went back by MRT,, then the rest went to bus stop near it.. SherLyn & her friend catched the NR bus.. Then I still can go back by 111,, yey… hehehehe… Ce Lyd went back by 16 & last Ko David & Andreas waLked to their place,, coz it’s quite near from there…

Fyuh,, fyuh,, I’m so tired now but it was a great time…. ActuaLLy,, I dun have any pLan for this Xmas,, I asked everybody but most of them are having pLans with their frinds or relatives… When I reached home & onLine,, a frind of mine asked whether I have any pLan or not… Then,, we decided to go to EspLanade…. Wow,, you know,, EspLanade is my 2nd fave pLace in Sg.. It’s aLready 1.5 months since the last time I went there… hahahaha…. hopefully I get experience such a nice & fun & wonderful Xmas today…

--Rancu--

Rancu's NegLigence Misrepresentation (Section 777)

The issue is whether I can sue you under negligence misrepresentation
which cause the plaintiff facing disappointment
FirstLy, I need to prove that you are negligence
I should establish that you have owed duty of care to me
I’ll be my own laywer

Went back to that memory….
Here comes proximity
Definitely there is a close proximity
None will doubt it
After all, there is a foreseeable duty of care to me
A reasonable person can see that you owe the duty of care

You also failed to exercise the required standard of care
Subjected to unforeseen circumstances,
You failed to tell the latent changes that suddenly come out
With the premises made by you
Therefore, you committed a breach of Rancu’s law

Hence, I can sue you for the damages that I need to get
I may seek for the remedies that I’m longing to
The losses that I suffered are disappointment and time wasted
Although it apportioned due to contributory negligence,
it still suffices as a breach of negligence misrepresentation
And you liable for the losses I suffered

--Rancu--

Ps: whoaaaaa… I dunno why I can make this “Law” poem…
But,, it’s kinda weird & funny,, isn’t it ???
Hahahahahah…

this morNing..

Whoaaaaaa….
2 more days untiL Christmas…I get my short break now,, but when it comes to hoLiday,, I dun have anything to do.. I mean,, anything “speciaL” to do… I remembered few days ago,, I talked with my friends that we wouLd go there,, we wouLd do that,, we wouLd watch those movies.. we pLanned to do aLL those things afTer we finish our Law Assignment.. But now,, hahahahaha… we Finished it aLL & what happened ?? We don’t do anything!!!! Hahahahahah… so funny….

This morning,, I woke up a bit Late,, around 8 am.. FeLt a bit Lazy coz it’s holiday…. But I must wake !!! Hohohoho… first thing to do,, of course read the word of God as my strength to do aLL the activities today… then after that,, I wanted to go to Living room but nothing to do.. So,, I decided to read the book (which aLmost 2 weeks I forgot to continue read it,, hehehe..) Van,, FinaLLy,, I read it completeLy !!! yey,, yey…^^ Later,, I’LL return to u,, hohoho…

Then,, then,, when I went out to the Living room,, my houzmate & her parents (which arrived yesterday nite..) aLready wake up.. We chatted,, ate breakfast with instant noodle called “Mie CeLor” They said it special from Palembang,, hoho… & u know… they brought “PemPek”,, hohohoho I Like it…. Though it’s spicy,, but I stiLL Like it (I dun Like spicy red.) & suddenLy our fridge is fuLL of others food… hahahahaha…

Okie..okie..
Then now.. I’m aLone… I’m okay,, I guess…
I need a space to think..
Yupz,, yupz,, there are many things that I shouLd think about.. many things need to be considered…
Okie,, I’LL continue Later.. need to do sumthin…
Cya…^^

--RanCu--

contact Me...

SuddenLy,, I miss U my friend..
Dunno why…
This morning,, u just came out in my mind..
I dunno why,, but I believe God knows the reason..

So,,so…
How’s Life darLenggggg ???
It just a weeK ago since our Last conversation…
But,, this particular of time,, I need your help..
Things become worst and worst & I really confuse..
I remembered when u gave me advice regarding this problem..
Hahahahahahaha…. Did u realize that it helped me a lot ??

Now,, pLease help me once again..
Coz I think u’re the one who knows that problem..
I really need to taLk with u again…
Huhuhuhuhuhu…
Miss u…

My path..

When we’re together times are good
Which makes it hard to be apart
The more my joy when I’m with you
The more the anguish in my heart

My words a silent whisper
Flowing through the empty hall
Without an echo, they fade away
So was it worth, for me to stay

Life is a journey of time
Where a heart need another to give it a shine
And we’all part of a journey
With two paths to take
One that is right and the one that can break
The path to true love can often be
Long, winding and rocky

The journey can be easy at times
But difficult at others
It can be short for some
But long for others
It will never be the same for each other
Cause we’re all different
None of us will ever know this path is like
Until we have to travel it ourselves

--RanCu--

hohohohohoho.....

FinaLLy,, I can take a deep breath of freedom for a whiLe…
yeah,, at Least no more assignment untiL new year…
my Last assignment wiLL due tomorrow & I’m done it (yey !!!!) Thanks God I can finish it now…
but I stiLL dunno whether my work wiLL get a good mark or not,, hahahhaaha….
ActuaLLy,, I’m a bit worried for this subject (since I dun Like it,, hoeks..hoeks..) but I’ve tried my best to do it… The rest wiLL be HIS job…
Fyuh,, fyuh… this assignment (Law.. red.) drove me crazy !! I think not onLy me,, but my friends as weLL. For a couple of days,, we just Like ughhhhhhh…. Cannot imagine… hahahahahah… Worry,, confuse,, dunno how to start,, screw up !!!
But,, we dun have any choice.. we shouLd face it.. we must do it… I just want to say thanks for Venkat (My Lord,, hihihi..) He’s my Lecturer.. he’s so kind.. thx My Lord.. u’re so funnyyyyyyy My Lord,, hahahhahha… Thx for ManChuw,, Feby,, SweeTy,, Mazni & aLL of my friends who heLp me doing this bLoody assignment….
Okie.. oKie.. I think I shouLd stop taLk about that assignment !!!!

Move to another topic….
& here it comes: CHRISTMAS… hehehehehe…
UnfortunateLy,, I dun have enough hoLiday !!! I just have short break froM 22nd– 26th Dec & from 29th Dec – 2nd Jan… huhuhuhu…
Dunno why,, but I’m so excited waiting for Christmas to come in Sg... This is my 2nd Christmas here…
Yupz,, I remembered Last year I ceLebrated Christmas in Sg with my famiLy…
This year,, they won’t come here due to some activities in Jkt…
But,, I think it shouLd be okie,, since I stiLL have my LoveLy friends surrounded me…
Like yesterday,, I attended Christmas celebration among the member of our FamiLy Altar.... aih,, aih,, it was a greaT time… Thx to u aLL… I’m bLessed to have u aLL around me here… I do reaLLy appreciate it…

The Last thing…
actuaLLy,, dunno what to say anymore…
stiLL thinking,, keep thinking…
about me,, about U,, about him,, about her,, about them…
why ?? why ?? why ??

--RanCu--

HappY bDae paPikuw...

For a father, a teacher, a friend of mine..
Happy birthday dad..
On this special day,
let’s sing a song from our soul
Sing to us your sweet song
Sing for all the years you have been granted
Rejoice in all the pleasure

I want this day to be for you
For everything you are to me
And all the things you do
May your happiness fulfill your goodness
As is just and right
And so as poetry it flows to you
That I may words with all my love to you

--Rancu--

YearNing...

What did you see deep inside me
that I never knew was there?
I’ve no idea what feeling’s in your heart
I’ve no idea what I am thinking of
You ask me what I’m thinking
But I can’t tell you
You never uttered the words I longed to hear
I just want to make you smile as you make me

If I could break your mind
I’d leave a note that said you were like
A song that I must struggle not to sing
A poem that I must never read aloud
But those are not hiding the way I feel

Can’t decide what I should do
I don’t like always running hot and cold
I feel afraid of getting too involved
And probably causing greater pain
Cause I cannot know where this will take us

I’ve been waiting for a couple of weeks
And I know we shouldn’t rush
Let’s take this chance to know each other better

--RanCu--

Thank you...

No longer will I count my tears
For I do know deep in my heart
It is time to say goodbye
It is time for separation

So by this day..
For nobody else but you, I play
A sound of all we have been through
As in my memories you do stay

Thank you for giving me a memorable evening
That no one knows what may be right or wrong
Only souls that connected by conversation
Without boundaries…
Like a shadow that never apart

Thus, at peace, I then shall feel precious
Every second every breath
That cannot be replaced by anything

--Rancu--

Gone..Gone..Gone..

I miss you again, just like yesterday
You just keep appearing in my mind
My desire to see you just won’t disappear
Think about the love inside the strength of heart
Making me cry with pain
The more I comfort myself, the more I cry
Even if I wipe out those tears secretly

I wanted you right here with me
But I have no choice you've gotta leave
There is nothing to say the day you leave
Wishing you would call me on the telephone
Sick and tired of this world
To bring us back to the time
A time when life was not this hard
I find I’m more hurt and lost than ever before

After you’re gone..
I cannot say I won’t see you again
I guess you just don’t know how much it hurts
After you’re gone..
I realised I didn’t do so well
The little time I had

You were yesterday, which I remembered
As something more than just a friend
You seem so lovely, like a melody
Thank you for the happiness we shared

--RanCu--

Error moDe: ON...

I’m broken now…
But somehow,, I’m still hoping
Fistly, I try to put the pain behind me
So you don’t have to see all the pain
I’ll keep it silent in my heart
I’ll hold it in my quiet arms
But all of that can’t hide the way I feel

An unsaid truth is like a wall
It always keeps us apart
I regret that I never say it
Now, when chances are not there
I’m seeking for it
I whisper to myself, as if I were stupid

So now, as a friend I need to tell you
What is inside my heart
What is the secret that I always hide it from you
Think this poem as a caress
That says my affection gracefully
The more I am away from you
The more I want you here right by my side
The more I think about you
The more I want you near

waLah,,waLah…
Ini RanCu terSerang virus opo toH yoo ????
Lagi sTudy weeK tuh hrsNa bLajar Nak,, iki kok maLah asiK2an buAt bLog terus2an segh ???? ckckckckck………
Yupz,, yupz,, harap makLum degh…
bgiNiLah anaK yg sedaNg boSen,, biNun,, buTuh hiBuran !!!!

--RanCu--

a Change....

eheM.. eHem…
RanCu mo ngobRoL2 agh….
Yupz..yuPz.. berhubung skrg Lg zamanNa “Study WeeK”,, I have a Lot of spare time…
I know that I shouLd spend this time effectiveLy & efficientLy…. yaH,, mengiNgat buKu2 yg tebeLna ga kiRa2 (amPe bisa buaT pingsaN org kLo kena puKuL tuh buKu),, seharusNa & seLayakNa saYa tuh nyiciL beLajar… buKan bgiTu buKan ???
anyWay,, di ruMah males ngaPa2in (hanYa mondaR manDir mejA mkn & dapuR)… maKa drpd krn oLeh sebaB iTu,, disiniLah saYa menuLis bLog haNya unTuk menGhabizkaN waktu…

hmm…hmm…
I just oPened my oLd photo aLbum (thx to om MonyeT yg udaH bwiN ke siNi…)
When I opened it,, ehm…ehm… feeL Like I wanna go back to my oLd Life… at thiZ particular of time,, I really mizz my parentz… when I saW the photos one by one,, hmmmmm the memories suddentLy come into my mind….
terNyata RanCu bner2 bruBah… aLthough peruBahan nTu dLm haL yg sekeciL apaPun,, but Rancu muLe bruBah…

sesuAi dgN bahan FA hr iNi,, peruBahan….
terNyata di dLam Tuhan, Rani bner2 bruBah… seteLah direnung2i,, ke araH yg Lbih bgs tenTuna…
peruBahanNa ga hrs diLihat dLm haL yg bsr kan ?? kadang kt bs bruBah dLm haL2 keciL yg ga kiTa sadaRi… duLu bgt sbeLom Rani dkeT ama Tuhan,, Rani tuh anaK yg bs diBiLang keRas kLo dah puNya kemauaN… kLo dah biLang A,, yah braRti A… ga ad tawaR2an Lg… but now,, I caN reaLize that He has already changed me…. Rani sadAr skrg Rani udaH bs Lebih kompromi dLm haL2 terTentu,, udaH bs ngaLah sama tmen,, dah bs ngeRtiin keaDaan & perAsaan org,, waLopun msh jg bLjr buat Lbih peKa Lg… but at Least,, peruBahan Ntu tamPak nyata bukan ???

Then,, sperTi yg saya critaKan di FA… duLuna tuh haTi Rani seKeras baTu.. mungKin ntu related ama gaYa RanCu yg boyish abizz… tuH haTi bs sedinGin guNung es kLi,, hahahhaah… But noW,, as the time goes by & wiTh the touch of my Lord,, rani muLe ngeRasa kLo akU daH nggaK sekeras duLu Lg… justru skRg,, cpet ngerasa iBa… seengakna mule tumBuh Lah sdikit bagi2 perhatiaN ke tmen2, hahahaha… kLo ad yg Lg kesusaHan,, pengen rasaNa sLaLu ad buat ngeBantu… tp apa daya,, kadaNg ad haL2 yg ngebatAsin aku untuk berBuat sesuaTu… but Praise Lord that He made changes to me….

Hmm…hmm… tiBa2 saYa menganTuk (sambiL menguap negh ~_~”)
wakTu menunJuKkan puKuL 1.51 am…
Ok agh,, saya mo mLanjutKan chatting kembaLi… hahahhaahaha….

DunnO...

Something strange has come over me
My head is battling with my heart
You make me feel upside down
I feel the broken heaven inside my heart
You unlock my heart that I kept well hidden

I remember all the things we did together
I find my happiness in seeing you
I know you are not mine and I’m not yours
I know we haven’t known each other long
But I see u everyday
And time went by so fast when I was with you
Even though I know I can’t be with you, it stays on my mind

Why did you have to come into my life if you weren’t going to stay?
How could you just go?
You know that you made an impact on me
I guess you don’t know how much it hurts
I can’t think you know and just don’t care

Why did you change?
What did I do?
How could you forget so fast?
I’ve learned not to believe my eyes
Nor trust the instinct of my heart

I don’t understand what happened to us
Or why you have turned away
Of course you are free to do as you like
I want you to know that your friendship is something
You’d find in me still a good friend
We are good friend, I appreciate it

--RanCu--

ehm..ehm..ehm..

Here I am ….
Late at night on the sofa
Remember when we first met
You gave a smile that I could never forget
I think I can’t tell you what this meant to me
How can I hide it all away?
How can I hide it when we are together?

You make it everything so easily
You make me laugh a lot
I know that we have got a real good time
How can I pretend these entire things?
I always get stuck with these emotions
How can I put what I feel into words?
I’ve been thinking to keep it going on

But, I guess that this is over now
I should leave you now
I said I’ll leave you
Cause I can’t take the pain
It’s hard to continue this love that ain’t the same
Nothing I can do about it, nothing I can say

Suddenly, I can never seem to give up on you
Is it me?
Am I so complicated?
I was lying to myself…
And now, I’m dying in this hell

– RanCu –

weLcoMe BacK...

Yup..yup..
weLcome back to SingapoRe,, a smaLL countRy wiTh “kia su” peopLe aLL aRound…
I came back 2 weeKs ago and jusT starTed my dipLoma part 2,, huhuhuhuhu…. There aRe more Less 25 studeNts in my new cLass,, totaLLy diffeRent with my pRevious cLass which is onLy consisTs of 5 peopLe,, hehehehe… most of theM are SingaporeaN,, 1 from Myanmar,, 1 from London,, and 1 from Indonesia,, the rest aRe SgreaN,, hahahahaha… I have 4 subjects for diz term,, more tough than before… huhuhuhuu,, dun wanna taLk about school anymore…

oH iYa,, for my “KakaK ipAr” I forget ur bdae !!!! mianhe !!! through diz bLog,, I wouLd say : hepi beLated bdae to u !!!! hahahahahaha…
hepi bdae aLso for aLL of my friendz who ceLebrate their bdae diz month ( RabieZ,, Dei,, Eko,, Cece MArice,, Cindy,, DiTa,, Atunk,, n others )

Then,, for my “om” who wants to move somewhere,, I’LL mizz u buddy !!!! hahahahahaha…. There wiLL be hard for me to find someone Like u,, here !!! if I could make a wish,, pLease dun go n stay here with me…. But,, it’s impossible right ??? I know,, u must Leave Sg n continue ur Life in ur new pLace,, huhuhuhuhu… gud Luck yach “Om” !!!!
oh ya,, stiLL have 1 more wish to u: maY u come here on 07.07.07 (see the date,, hahahaha) ?? I want to spent that whoLe day with u n others,, since the date is triple 7 !!! huahuahuahua..
ok Lah,, enouGh for diz time…
bubYe,,

Le gRa’
--RanCu--

meLLow side of RanCu..

aLL the peopLe come and go in our Life,, it aLso happen with me… one daY u stay,, and the other day u Leave me aLone with the emptiness… never couLd imagine how badLy when u waLk out without notice at aLL… I even can’t caTch ur shadoW to keep it in my Heart.. aLL the meMories that we’ve made just Left in my thought.. aLL the day that we’ve gone through just pass me by and I can’t have it oNce again… feeL so dowN wHen I thiNk aBout the tiMe that I’ve spenT with u,, that was soooo perfeCt,, aLthough it means nothing for u.. (weLL,, I think so..)

u show me the Way to go thRough when I was bLind… the gave me ur time wHen I need iT the most… the way that u speak aMazed me …. the ideas tHat came out from your mind, suRprises me… the things that u’ve done maKes me proud of u.. u sHowed me the thiNgs that I wanT to know… u cheeR me up wheN I was upSet… thaNk you for giVing up ur day that time..

but sometimes u make me confuse.. suddenLy u change without say a word.. bit by bit I find out u become further & further awaY from me… we aRe Like two sTrangers everyTime we meet.. seems Like we’ve never knowN each otHer befoRe.. u’re too busy with ur friends and neVer consider other peopLe who cares with u..

don’t get me wRong with aLL this situation… I don’t know wHy we can stuck in This time when aLL the things get harDer to Let go.. in tHis particuLar moMent when aLL seems so bad,, “I need u” that’s the woRst thing !!!! even myself,, I can’t beLieve it can come out from my miNd… but I think that’s the point.. and it becomes worst & worst when it comes thr tiMe for u to go,, for u to conTinue ur journey in ur Life.. I have my own Life and so do u.. then what shouLd I ask for ??? the time that seParate us wiLL come and I can’t hide it away… few months toWards, i wiLL no Longer can see u… I shouLd be gLad,, cause maybe thiz is d best waY for us since we’Ve kn0wn that we can’T be together..

eVer think about the chaNce that I never had to say,, too shy to speak it Loud,, too scary to know the reaL truth,, too hard to pretend it oVer… we starTed as a frienD but ended with a messy thing surRound us.. buT I reaLize eVen thouGh we foRce us to be together,, it can hurts ourseLves.. too many differenCes between us that makes the disTance becomes more far..
u don’t have to say goodBye,, just turn ur back away and Leave… I can preTend that there’s no sadness in my eyes,, but I can’t Lie to myseLf… maybe after u Leave,, I’LL Look for a pLace to ease my paiN,, tHen reaLize that the pLace I Love to go is the pLace that Reminds me of u…

the Last part,, I just wanT to attach this Lyric.. how can I not love you by Joy Enriquez.. this is my fave song !!!! and I think it’s suitabLe for me now… huhuhuhuuhu….

can not touch,, can not hold
can not be together
can not love,, can not kiss
can not have each other
must be strong and we must let go
can not say what our hearts must know
how can I not love you
what do I tell my heart
when do I not want you here in my arms
how does one walks away from all of the memories
how do I not miss you when you are gone
can not dream,, can not share
sweet and tender moments
can not feel what we feel
must pretend its over
must be brave
and we must go on
must not say what we’ve known all along

Le gRa'
--RanCu--

25.04.06

Yay !!! officiaLLy,, He giVes me 1 moRe yeaR agaiN !!! Thanx God…. Hihihihihihi,, getting oLder now,, then I hoPe I beCome more MatuRe thAn beFore,, more GeneroUs 2 aLL peopLe,, moRe friendLy tHan the past,, smarTer from yesterday,, huahuahuahuaha… tooooooo much wisHes foR thiz year,, yeaH thiz is the tiMe foR wisheS !!!!

Ok tHen,, thaNx for the greetin9s froM U aLL,, I reaLLy appreCiate iT…. Friends aRe the 1 of the imporTant tHings in my Life sinCe I don’t haVe any sibLing… thaT’z whY I reaLLy Love U !!!!!

2nd things,, thiz year aLso noT as baD as I thought.. aLthough I face a little bit of sadness recently,, but it’s quite oke Lah.. I stiLL can handle it…. Don’t worry too much about that.. & today,, I reaLLyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy get my TruLy haPPinessssssssss !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! such a wonderfuL birthday !!!!
I though I would pass This day wiTh LoneLiness,, which is Not tRue at aLL !!! guys,, U make me sooooooooooo gLad !!!!
I woke up wiTh gratefuLness to the Lord for giving this daY…. I openEd my eyes,, said a LittLe prayer 2 Him… then my paRents caLLed me,, huhuhuuuhu I mizz them so much thiz Time…

The story wenT on….
yaiH,, feeL a LittLe sadness since today goT fuLL day cLazz… the morning cLass was OrganistionaL communication…. Whoa,, males bgT degH… tp,, yagh mo giMana Lg,, aku ga mo skip cLass noH… ya wes,, try to enjoy it !! di kLas ok2 aj nieh…
LaLu pas bReakTime,, aku & syLvia ke oLd Chang Kee berdua,, since Dhyani pUyenk2 gTu ( kacian dy,, meLer2 muLu gtu..,, cepeT semBuh ya Dy..) Then,, steLah baLik dr oCk,, kt berdUa ngeLiat Darren di TMC office.. LaLu kT bedua nginTip2 dy dL gTu.. trus saKing ga ad kerjaanNa,, aku ngeceK bLackboaRd,, ngeLiat si coBre ad kLas apa ga (terNyata ga ad tUh…) Trus si syLvia jg nemeNin aku nginTip kLasNa si Niza (ngeLiat tuh tuKang bolos masuK apa ga…) eh,,, yg kLiatan maLah si Tukang nganTuk (ReMon,, red.) n tmen2 homBrengaNna (Sugi & Chris,, red.) Then dHyaNi phoned syL… we should come back to cLazz… suddenLy,, when I opened the door…..

WOW !!!! suRprise !!!!! I saW DhyaNi was hoLdin9 a TiramisU cake sto0d in FronT of Me !!! CiTra was aLso theRe… Yay !!! such a UnpredicTabLe suRprise !!! aku sempeT mikiR kaLo bdaY taoN ini bkaLan biasa aj n nge-boRinG-in,,but… who knows ??? LaLu aku masuK kLas,, made a wish & bLew d candles !!! terNyata syL n Dhy bw tuH cake pagi2 & dititiPin ke Choon Hua,, comm. LectuRer (braRti dy tau kan kLo aku bday,, maLu2in aj..) Then,, kT poTong kuE n baGi2 degh,, ad feBy,, okTa jg… tRus berHuB dah tau,, aku ksH ke Choon Hua n George Han Lah,, ga enaK kLi… tHen,, I phoned Niza to come to our cLazz.. Remon jg skaLian degh,, n dy bw pasuKan hoMbrenganna yg bedua nTu td..
ditamBah Lg,, dpt kadO kereN !!! terNyata ciTra tuH ngbuaTin aku kaoS yg disabLon namakuw… Jd kaoS iTem poLos gTu,, di bgn depAn bwh dituLis “Rancu” n at the back,, ad angk “7” gede bgT !!!! whoa,, Rancu kan demen ama angKa 7…. Kekkekekekek,, trus syL n Dhy jg ngasiH tmpT hP warna biRuna bgs bgT,, trus ad boNekaNa gTu di dpnna… wahhhhhh,,, RanCu terHaru…..

we should had afternoon cLass,, but we were too tired so,, we decide to make a make up cLazz Later for econz… George aLso agree about iT… then,, suddenLy,, me,, ciTra,, syLvia n dHyani wanted to go to GeLare..since today is Tuesday,, it means they have 50% for waffLe… actuaLLy we supposed to go home to study data analysis due to thE test tomorrow !!!! buT,, heheheheh,, thE temptation was soooo biG… finally we ended eaT,, siT,, chat n taLk foR aLmosT 3 houRs…the important Thing to do is TakiNg pictures !!! we can’T mizz it !!! oH iYa,, sbeLom brangKat ke city Link makaN GeLare,, kT sempeT duduK di tangga TMC,, trus ada juGa Lah yg ingeT uLtahkuw & diseLametin deh… buT I goT a greeting from someone speciaL,, from COBRE !!! how come he knows my bdaY ??? never mind Lah,, hehehheh….

syL n dHy wenT back via Mrt,, while I,, ciTra & EricK msh jLn2 ga jLas Lg… kt mamPiR ke MarcHe duLu,, mkn mashed potato aj secH..the after that,, tdna mreKa mo nganTer aku ke Marina sQuare (mo naeK shuttle bus red.),, tp pas mo ke Carrefour di Suntec,, kT ngeLiat hampiR smua org tuh meGang ice cream gTu.. sLidik punYa sLidik,, terNyata Ben & Jerry tuH Lg proMosi gTu… so they gave their ice cream for fRee !!! sperTi yg anda taU,, mana mungKin segh Rancu ngeLewaTin kesemPatan berHarga ini… akHirNa kT ikuT2 nganTri iCe cream gtu,, maLu segh,, tp cueK aj Lah,, wakakkkakaakak…
trus disoNo jg ad LamBangNa Ben & Jerry,, which iZ a cow.. yg paraH,, aku maLah mau foto ama tuh saPi.. perTamaNa segh jAim2 gTu,, tp akhiRna kt bneRan foto aJ gtu.. maLahaN,, ad oRg minta kT foto skaLey Lg buaT dokumeNtasi mreKa… huahuahua,, brasa aRtis bow… kikikikikikikiki….

Tak Trasa kaMi betiGa muTer2 Suntec ampe jam ½ 7 maLem,, pdhL tdna kan aku mo puLang mo tdr !!! akHirna jam 7 kurang kt naek ShuttLe bus,, tuRun di SomerseT… ciTra n Erick ke arah Orchard semEntara akU ke River valley,, mo ikuT FA… jd FA nTu kyk kebakTian di rmh gTu (buat yg gat au..) tHen,, FA kali ini kerEn… bnyK criTa2 menarik n awesome bgt !!!! dSini akU jg dpT buNga gTu,,, pas bgt !!! sore2 tuh pas jLan di Suntec,, aku biLang ama CitRa “ciT,, pengen degh dpT buNga hR ini… tp ga mungKin yah… hahahaha…” aku Lg pengen dpT bunGa,, Cuma since skaRang jombLo tuLen giNi,, mo dpT bunGa dr mana… Eh,, tiBa2 td BombiE ngasiH bunga gTu ke aku,,, waaaaaaaa kereN skaLey,,, terHaru Lg… pokoke FA hr ini TOP degh….

finaLLy,, I reached home at 12.25am,, fyuH… another day has come… giLe maN,, hR ini bneR2 shaRian ga di ruMaH euY !!!! RanCu hepyyyyyyy bgT !!!! TerNyata ada keSenanGan yg berBeda di Hr ini… waLopuN jauH dr maMi Papi,, buT I stiLL have u !!!! it was sooooo amazing !!!! I shouLd praise Him for giVing suCh this wonderfuL day to me,, for GiVing me aLL the LoveLy frienDz that I have now,, for giving me the peopLe who cares for mE aLL the Time….

--RanCu--

ApriL Sorrow..

Wuwuwuwuwu…. Asik2,, 2 hR Lg,, Less than 50 houRs a9ain,, I’LL bec0me 19.. asiK sEh asiK,, tapi daLemNa.. saPe yang taU seH…. iNi bakaLan jd uLtah RanCu perTama yg hrS diLewaTin jauH dr mami n PaPi,, aLso my Bestfriendz… jauh dr oRg2 yg dekeT di duNiaNa RanCu.. Emang sEh,, dsiNi juGa banYak tmen2 baru,, yg ga kaLah Lucu n bae sama yg tmen2kuw yg Lama,, taphey teteP aja RasaNa beda kLo ngeLewatin 1 hR yg rada sPeciaL ama oRg2 terdekaT… apaLagi ini msh daLam rangKa APRIL SORROW !! buTuh support dr oRg2 terdeket boW…. LagipuLa,, aKuw dah terBiasa ngeLewaTin bdaY dgN meLakuKan & meneRima haL2 yg “beDa dr biaSa”,, so ta0n iNi hRs terLatiH buaT bersiKap “biaSa” di Hr uLtah due t0 tmen2 Baruw yg bLom speNuhNa ngeRti akuw & since dsiNi akuw ga puNya soDara yg tau seLuk beLukNa akuw…

oH ya,, is It just my feeLing or not,, tp aku ngeRasa birthday ta0n ini baKaLan sedih.. padahaL bLom kejadiaN (jgn amPe deh,, sambiL ketok meJa kaYu 3x..),,tp dah ngeRasa gtu… moodY yg berbicara neH… aku tuh percaYa ama mood & feeLing akuw (dah seRing terbukti keampuHanNa..) seJak hR saBtu,, bwaanNa dieM muLu.. ranCu yg biaSaNa bner2 sLaLu enjoy her Life,, seJak kmaRen jd Rani yg menceMaskan sgala haL.. Rani yg biasaNa miKir seCara Rasional,, sKrang jd Rani yg Lbih suKa make praSaan.. tP tnaNg aj kok,, dr Luar ranCu msh RanCu yg peRiang,, sok Lucu,, poLos,, yg suKa NyanYi2 ga jLas & msh teteP Rancu yg keTawaNa pLing heBroN,, wakkakakakaak…. Try 2 hiDe iT fr0m U aLL,, just doN’t want U worry ab0ut me..

Note 4 MoNyet : nyet,, nyet… bagus Bgt yah Kmu !!!! bs2Na Lupa,, maKana kLo ngoMong tuH dipiKir duLu,, jaNji2 semBaranGan !!! Emang seh Kt ngomOng haL ntu dah Lamaaa bgT,, tp yg NamaNa jaNji teteP janJi oMkuw yg menyebaLkan… I guess u’LL forget iT… huhuhuhuhuhu…. Jadi maKin sediH deh,, huahuahuahua,, ga Lah… it’s not a biG deaL,, since yg ngomong tuh kmu… hehehehehehe…

whoa,, bebeRapa hr ini Lg buTuh 1 oRg aj deh,, buaT ngoBroL,, buaT ngabisiN 1 hr baReng2,, tp ??? enaK aja Rani mo nyuLik 1 oRg,, emaNgNa tuh oRg ga punya kerjaan Laen apa… apaLagi skarang tmen2 di TMC dah dkeT eXam period,, ad yg sbuK bLajar & berkuTaqt dgn aSsignMentNa,, trus tmen y9 Laen ad yg siBUk pindahaN rumaH,, ada jg yg siBuk pacaRan,, ada Yg sbuk ngurusiN keluargaNa.. poKokna kyKna smua org Lg sbuk,, ampe sbuk ga jLaz yg juGa ngabisiN bnyk waktu… aCtuaLLy, the main Point bukan RanCu biNun nyari sapE yg enaK diaJak ngobroL,, tp yg menjaDi probLemNa adaLah oRg nTu sperTina ga puNya wkT kosong,, mo MintaNa jd ga enaK aTi… pengen seH nyaRi orG Laen yg seeNak,, sepiKiran & seNyambuNg dy kLo diaJaK ngoBrol,, tp ga gamPang kLi !!!

to that pers0n: oM,, kamu tuH jaNgan miKir yg macem2 duLu dunk,, jaNgan amPe saLah pahaM ama akuw,, don’t geT me wrong.. emAng bneR kLo kmu tuh eNak diaJaK ngobroL, even haL yg ga penTing skaLipun !!!! taPi akU tuh bLom berMaksud ap2 Lho !!! inget yaCh !!! aku takuT kLo kaMu ntaR saLah pahaM ama akuw !!!

Trus buaT tmenkuw yg aNeh tp ngaNgeNin.. skArang aku tuH jd ngeRi2 kLo mo sms kMu,, mo neLpon kmU,, mo chaT ama Kmu… huhuhuhuhuhuu…. I want to taLk about everything,, but I don’t want just send the wordz,, I want to meeT U !!! But everyTime we Meet,, we LooK Like 2 StrangeRz,, soooooooo weird... it seems Like we never knOwn each other befoRe…. I haTe U !!!! buT soMetimez u’re too Good too me, oM.. Then what can I do ?? u’Re not Mine at aLL & I think never be Mine,, wahahahahahahah….. of course Lah….

--RanCu--

ApriL Sorrow

Here it coMez : aPriL soRrow....
ActuaLLy I don't want 2 caLL thiz LoveLy moNth wiTh It,, buT I feeL Like That... feeL Like thiz apriL wiLL not be as WonderfuL as anOther apRiL... so saD... I jusT hoPe tHiz monTh wiLL nOt as soRrow as My PredicTion,, exPecT i wiLL haVe a go0d Time,, gooD exPerieNceS,, unforgeTabLe moMentz... and Thiz moNth wiLL not be soRroW aNymoRe... You maY asK wHy I naMe it "ApriL soRrow",, these maY be soMe reAsonZ..

1st... Thiz ApriL I aLwaYz haVe fuLL day cLazz,, huhuhuhuhu.... and beCome moRe buSy siNce I'Ve beeN giVen th0se assignMenTs !!!! Wuah,, basicaLLy I wanT 2 do It as Quick as possibLe... but siNce I don'T haVE a deSire 2 staRt iT,, I juSt ReAd aLL the QuesTions wiThouT try 2 anSweR iT !!! hix..hix..hix.. WHere is The paSSion whEn I need it the mosT ???? MayBe I'LL do iT 2 oR 3 daYs beFore suBmissioN daTe,, sCary huH ??? Guyz,, doN't do Your assignMenT Like me... Try 2 do iT noW,, so you wiLL not geT rusH in the LAst minUte... By The enD of apRiL,, i musT hanDs up aLmosT of aLL my assignMent,, hix...hix..hix...

2nd... My ro0mate wiLL go baCk to China oN ApriL 15th... I'm jeaLous !!! She geT a Long hoLidaY froM ApriL 2 JuNe... and iN Mass CoMM,, sHe wiLL not haVE an Exam,, Not Like anY oTher disCipLiNe... huhuhuhuhu.... Then,, aFteR sHe go Back,, it meaNs i wiLL be aLoNe in my room.. NoboDy tHat I caN taLk with in this Empty Room... YuP,, I jUSt caN cHat via mSn wiTh oTher peopLe... so saD.. But,, on The oTher side,, I wiLL be fRee !!! Yipppie !!!! I caN do wHat I want 2 dO witHout disturBance aNymOre…

3rd.... The MosT saD thiNg is I wiLL ceLebraTe My biRthdaY aLone & faR apArt frOm mY FamiLy & aLL my beStFrienDz... Thiz is The fiRst timE i CeLebraTe birthDay withouT my faMiLy aRound Me... ActuaLLy Mommy Ask Me 2 go baCk 2 JkT,, buT I musT coNsider maNy tHings if I Go baCk 2 JkT juSt foR 1 daY.. I aLso caN't meeT my BestfrienDs at That Time... I mizz u aLL !!!! i mizz Ur surPrise 4 me.. This Year,,no More Surprise,, no More giFts,, wakakakkaakakak...
WeLL,, maYbe It heLps mE 2 beCome More maTure tHat befOre... Hope sO... To be a Nice Woman,, not ChiLdisH anYmoRe... wakakakakakakak Can I maKe iT ????

4th... I bet wiTh ciTra !!!! StaRted froM ApriL 1sT – 31st ,, I MUST taLk wiTh “aKu” & “kamU” if I taLk wiTh IndoNesiaN… Once I maKe a misTake,, theRe wiLL be a pUnishMent 4 me… Huhuuhuhu,, Quite funny Lah… ActuaLLy,, I want 2 teLL the punishment,, buT I’m aFraid ciTra wiLL angry & saY “Rani,, iT’z Not faiR !!!!!” We aRe noT pLaying wiTh money,, buT ouR pride… wakakakakakak….. HopefuLLy,, I wiLL wiN thiz game,, & I wiLL get a reward !!!!!

5th… huaHuaHuahu….. stiLL Left oNe maiN reason,, buaT I caN’t tell u aLL… just Keep Hide iT & preTend 2 be oK…

Let’s MoVe 2 anOther topic,,,,
4 CuNi…. CuMi2 goReng tePung,, Long timE noT heaR ab0ut yoUr condiTion,, theN suddenly I kNew that aCcideNt… I reAd your bLog & I reaLLy sHockEd !!!! hoW come it caN happen 2 you ??? pityfuLL…. Then how Is it noW ??? stiLL huRt huh ?? hope you wiLL geT better sooN… Mizz U.. WanT 2 chaT wiTh U… buT I know,, maybe you are BusY now 2 prePare 4 UAN right ??? gud Luck 2 U preN !!!!

4 AgneS…. NeneK,,, I mizz U a Lot !!!!!!!!!!!!!! I’m gLad heaR go0d news From you !!! hope you aLwaYs happy…. I musT teLL You thaT you are a LucKy person !!!! thank God foR iT !!! I just caN hope eVeryThing wiLL be aLrighT yeah !!!!!

4 ciTra…. sTupid !!! aCtuaLLy,, wHy caN we Think about thiz gamE ??? huahuahuahua…. I’m just wondeRing when I watch You pLay “engkLek” oR “3 LangKah” wiTh thEm…. Wakakakakakak… I’m sure I can pass iT !!! aza aZa fighting (4 myseLf…) !!!! Hey girL,, do You stiLL haVe time 2 accoMpanY mE again ??? where ??? just siTting aT TMC’s staiRz when I’m waiTing 4 sHuttLe bus,, hehehehehehe….

4 aTung…. Huehuehuehuehue…. stiLL waiTing afTer 3 yeArs ???? I give you 4 thumbs uP !!!! beFore I wRite this bLog,, I wAs reading your bLog,, heheheheheheh….. soMetimes it LooKs so stupid,, buT I know hoW deep is Your Love (sambiL nyanyi .red)… hoPe you geT the ResuLt soon,,, Hey,, do you know something !!!! you make me n ciTra feeL doWn… so ashmeD.. remeMber wHen You want 2 shoW yoUr housemate 2 us ??? Why don’t you teLL 2 us that he can understand Bhs Indo befoRe he Came ??? stupid !!!!!

The Last !!!! 4 “moNyet”…. Hip.. hip.. hip.. horey !!!!!! finaLLy I caN foRget you !!!!! wahahahahahahaha,, I’m happy !!!!! yeyeyeyeyeyeye….. I feeL better than beFore… I can’t believe,, I caN forgeT you !!!!! wewwwwwww,, I’m sMart !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!